Much like when I was growing up, recent phenomenon in my classes involve the female Middle School students. They have been their nastiest self towards each other. It is very disheartening to see that this behavior exists today. Do they realize that as women we must be advocates for one another?
As an educator not only am I required to teach my children the state mandated standards, but I am also compelled to teach them general “rules for the road”. I have absolutely no problem with this, the relationships I have built with my wonderful kiddo’s makes helping with any problems a necessity.
Now one of the books that I continue to use as a source of inspiration is The Velveteen Principles by Toni Raiten-D’Antonio.
The Happiness Project (also a website) written by Gretchen Rubin offers some great advise on many things and some on how to be a true and great friend. If you try and follow these simple rules hopefully your life wont has short friendships but ones that are long and true:
Be supportive when your friend has bad news. Don’t you just hate it when you are trying to bear your soul to somebody and they aren’t giving it the attention you feel it deserves?
Be supportive when your friend has good news. This is something that can be just as hurtful as the former. If someone is unable to celebrate your successes as well as your failures shouldn’t you question that friendship.
Don’t gossip. If you are constantly talking bad to one friend about the other, don’t you think they will start to wonder if you are constantly talking bad about them to the other person?
Keep a secret. One of the best things about having a close friend is feeling comfortable sharing secrets with them. Not keeping a secret safe can destroy trust and ruin friendships.
Don’t criticize or flirt with a friend’s sweetheart. Along with secrets this is something that can ruin a friendship.
Show up. Not only is it important to be there for a friend emotionally but also making sure they feel comfortable going somewhere by being their support can be just as important.
I don’t know if many of my students will be too apt to follow such rules, but I think just by mentioning the words to them It will make a difference (at least this teacher hopes so).
Am I a nerd or what?! Hope you enjoyed the “lesson in friendship”!!!
Love and Friendship,